The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband. ' '
The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands. ' '
The husband thought for a moment: 'Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me. ' The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. ' So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!...the husband became 92 years old. '
The moral of this story: Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember fairies are female......' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Computers
' If ever you have problems with your pc it is probably an ID ten T problem, read on....
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Richard, the 11 year old next door (whose bedroom looks like Mission Control), and asked him to come over.'
Richard clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? '
He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that?' In case I need to fix it again.'
Richard grinned. ' 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?''
No,' I replied.
'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.''
So I wrote it down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like the little shit..
Cannibal Story
'cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant operated by a fellow cannibal. Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu...
Sun Grilled Tourist: '£5.00
Broiled Missionary: '£7.00
Fried Explorer with garlic: '£9.00
Freshly Baked: Politicians' '£150.00
The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, 'Why such a huge price difference for the Politicians?'
The cook replied, 'Have you ever tried to clean one? ' They're so full of shit, it takes all morning!'
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